Hugs you (gently) for being part of the writer/artist, queer neurodivergent tribe… So spoon-giving when you GET someone and they GET you and the words you say mirror each others’ and everything is YES!!! THIS!!! 🙌🏼 and nothing needs to be explained… When community IS home, is safety, holds you, is self-care and self-love. 🦄💜 #grateful
When I posted this update on social media yesterday, Samwise (aka Sam Dylan Finch, aka SDF) was one of the peeps being addressed. Because when you have no spoons to think, speak, reply to social media comments, tribe members like Sam speak for you (you now or you past or you future), and it just feels like they’re sitting next to you, in the silence that you need, holding you, and that is EVERYTHING.
Confession: When I’m happy, I freak out.
A blog-reader-turned-bestie (yes, sometimes I befriend y’all in real life because you are lovely human beings) and I were recently talking about this over milkshakes. Being happy is terrifying when you aren’t quite used to it.
You know, that dreaded sense that the other shoe will fall? Yeah. That. It’s the worst.
The pressure of trying to sustain something that we’re not used to can create a lot of stress for us. And we might feel the impulse to self-sabotage, especially when we don’t have the support we need to cope.
Sometimes I even have suicidal thoughts when I’m happy. Do you?
The idea that I’ve peaked, and that I might as well die now while things are still good. It seems like the perfect time. Then I fall down the rabbit hole of, “Am I actually happy if I’m having thoughts like…
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